I think really deep, especially when I'm left alone.
When do you stop fighting?
I have come across this question far too many times this year.
Am I the one changing drastically,
or is it really what my girlfriends tell me; their loss.
Every person is affected and molded by days and years in their lives,
but at the same time I don't want to lose touch.
Some big decisions are coming, and this month could change my life forever,
but I just am in this weird state of mind, where I want to stay and go at the same time.
I love spontaneity. I want to go outside and be this world's biggest explosion.
There are just these limits and barriers keeping me here, in little Wisconsin, wishing and hoping for things to go my way.
But, maybe my way isn't the right way to go? I'm the most stubborn person I know.
I could be too close-minded to enjoy things that I have not planned, or wanted to happen in the first place.
There is this weird beating that I hear when I think of some people, mostly boys.
Boys.
Boys.
Yes, not men. They don't deserve to be holding a superior title to twelve year olds.
I am regretting trying to 'figure them out'. I just want honesty, blunt, honesty.
I am already in this place, and can't be broken down because of pointless decisions.
Nobody wants to be where they aren't wanted.
It's almost like I'm being tested. If I can handle this, I can handle anything, right?
It's really hard to forget promises that were so right, yet broken.
My mind needs to take a vacation, from thinking, wanting, hoping, dreaming, visualizing, and fixing; these hurtful darts that I keep throwing it's way.
It's me, all me.
I don't blame anybody for the places I am and have been. I fell into situations I shouldn't have let myself fall into; yes fall.
Why is it so easy to fall, yet so much harder to get yourself back up.
There is this phenomenon with my friends that amazes me.
These girls are spectacular, flawed, real women, ...women, searching for love with broken promises and regretful kisses.
Isn't that the most beautiful thing?
I saved this picture to re-blog sometime, and then I saw you did. Beautiful minds think alike.:)
ReplyDeleteI love the honesty of this! I'm assuming you have things to tell me! ;)
Oh, and especially loving the bottom where you say, "There is this phenomenon with my friends that amazes me. These girls are spectacular, flawed, real women, ...women, searching for love with broken promises and regretful kisses.
Isn't that the most beautiful thing?"
So lovely.
Lovely dear, we're all being tested all the time, the best part is when you go out and do what you want and leave all the mess behind you. It may still be there when you get back, but you will be stronger when you return to face it. Life is short sweet thang. Go be amazing :]
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